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The Space Between. Matthew BraddockЧитать онлайн книгу.

The Space Between - Matthew Braddock


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Find pictures of spiritual activists you admire. Fasten their photos on a wall — along with a mirror. As you look at those pictures, can you see yourself as a spiritual activist in the making, ready to be on the wall alongside those other images? If a mirror on the wall next to the photos is too public, get a small mirror, look into your own eyes, and ask yourself some simple questions before you get into bed at night or when you wake in the morning: “In what ways was I the person I most longed to be today? What helped me to get there? In what ways did I fall short? What do I need in my life to do better?” Instead of being a symbol for narcissism, the mirror becomes a sacred object. If we do this practice long enough and regularly enough, we will not only see ourselves in the mirror. We will see the image of God. We will begin making choices to benefit that person.

      For Contemplative Action:

       Get to know your Conflict Style

      Spiritual activists will, no doubt, encounter conflict along the way. It is helpful to know how you handle conflict, and how members of your faith community deal with differences. Read each of the following statements and rate each response according to your most probable action or choice in each case. (1) will be your first choice, (2) will be your second choice, (3) will be your third choice, etc. Rank all five answers.

      1. You are about to go into a public meeting in which a new policy will be offered where there is much disagreement. Your perspective to this policy is quite different than the rest of the community. Resistance to the majority will likely annoy many of the people there. You are most likely to:

      1 Stand fast for your position.

      2 Look for some middle ground.

      3 Go along with the wishes of the majority.

      4 Remain silent during the meeting.

      5 Try to re-frame the issue so that all sides can be included in the solution.

      2. I would say the following about differences:

      1 Differences are to be expected and reflect the natural order: some have resources and others have none, some are correct, and some are wrong.

      2 Differences should be considered with the common good in mind. At times parties are obliged to lay aside their own views in the interest of the majority.

      3 Differences serve only to drive people apart and their personal implications cannot be ignored.

      4 Differences reflect the basic attributes of people and are largely beyond influence.

      5 Differences are a natural part of the human condition and are neither good nor bad.

      3. I would say the following regarding the nature of conflict

      1 Ultimately, right prevails. This is the central issue in conflict.

      2 Everyone should have an opportunity to air feelings so long as they do not block progress.

      3 Conflict requires self-sacrifice, the placing of the importance of continued relationships above one’s own needs and desires.

      4 Conflict is one of the evils in human affairs and should be accepted.

      5 Conflict is a symptom of tension in relationships, and when accurately interpreted, may be used to strengthen relationships.

      4. I would say the following regarding the handling of conflict:

      1 Persuasion, power, and force are all acceptable tools for achieving resolution and most expect them to be used.

      2 It is never possible for all people to be satisfied. Resolving conflict means persuasion combined with flexibility.

      3 It is better to ignore differences than to risk open conflict. It is better to maintain the basis of relationship than to risk it.

      4 Impersonal tolerance is the best way to handle conflict.

      5 Conflict resolution requires confrontation and problem solving, often going beyond the apparent needs and opinions of the parties involved.

      Based on your answers, how would you identify your dominant conflict resolution strategies? Each of the lettered answers for questions 1-4 point to a common conflict resolution style:

      1 Control or Competition (using power to win your position)

      2 Compromise (finding moderate, mutually acceptable solutions)

      3 Accommodation (neglecting personal outcomes for the sake of the other)

      4 Avoidance (sidestepping, postponing, or withdrawing from conflict)

      5 Collaboration (seeking assertive and cooperative settlements)10

      5 T.V. Philip, "Christian Spirituality (1 Corinthians 1:18-25)," Religion Online, http://www.religion-online.org/showarticle.asp?title=1539.

      6 Victor Frankle, Man’s Search for Meaning (New York: Pocket, 1959).

      7 Hirschfield, Brad, You Don't Have to Be Wrong for Me to Be Right: Finding Faith Without Fanaticism (New York: Harmony, 2009), 65.

      8 Fischer, Noah. "Occupying Tension," Inquiring Mind (2012), http://www.inquiringmind.com/Articles/OccupyingTension.html.

      9 Hirschfield, 248.

      10 For more explanation of these descriptions, see Norma Cook Everist, Church Conflict: From Contention to Collaboration (Nashville: Abingdon, 2004).

      11 Adapted from S. Rice, Non-violent conflict management: Conflict resolution, dealing with anger, and negotiation and mediation (Berkeley: University of California at Berkeley, California Social Work Education Center: 2002).

      2

      Covenant, Conflict, and the Common Good

      When I meet with parents who want their children to receive baptism, I frame the ritual in terms of covenant. God calls us. We respond. The congregation witnesses, affirms, and supports the vows that are made. As we prepare, I ask parents to tell me what they think the word “covenant” means. Answers range from confused shrugs to “a place where nuns live.” Some will state that a covenant is like a legal contract. Most do not think about a set of mutual promises that call us to faithful accountability while being sustained by God’s grace. The metaphor of covenant can also provide a framework and vocabulary for spiritual activists to understand what it means to be faithful to God through active contemplation and contemplative action.

      When it comes to spiritual activism, we also remember that


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