Sins of Omission. Fern MichaelsЧитать онлайн книгу.
endures,’ it says. Signed J. J. ‘Blackjack’ Pershing himself!”
“That’s all very fine, Reuben…for you. But where do I fit in?”
“You’ll be right beside me. Daniel, you have to learn how to be gracious when someone offers you something. Always accept. I’m accepting this for both of us. We’ll mend, get our health back, have a little fun, and then head back to the States. I told you I’d take care of you, and I will. I made a promise to you and to myself. You’re going to be ‘the finest lawyer in the country,’ to use your own words, and I’m going to be…I don’t know yet, but I do know I’ll be wearing silk jackets, walking on thick carpets, serving the best caviar with chilled champagne. I’m going to have a mansion with a whole battalion of servants and money to burn. And if I get in trouble along the way, you’ll be the hotshot lawyer who’ll get me out of it. We made a deal, Daniel.”
“What if I can’t see when they take the bandages off? Then what? What if I’m blind? B-l-i-n-d! How will I go to law school then? Are you going to lead me around on a string?”
“Damn you, Daniel, shut up,” Reuben growled. “You aren’t going to be blind. I’m not. I couldn’t see very well for a few days, but my eyesight is almost restored. I still have to have the treatments, so will you. And just for the record, yes, I would lead you around on a string. I’d find a way for you to get to law school if I had to go with you. You got that?”
The eighteen-year-old soldier sighed. There wasn’t a whole lot left to believe in, but he did believe in Reuben. Reuben was the brother he never had, the uncle he’d always wished for, the father he would have died for. Reuben was his friend. Reuben had saved his life and was willing to believe in his dream of finishing his education and becoming a good lawyer. Reuben believed in him. And if it took the rest of his miserable life, he would repay the debt.
Reuben’s gray eyes sparkled mischievously. “Madame Mickey tells me her cousin’s daughter by marriage is expected shortly after Thanksgiving. Her name is Bebe and her father is a famous moviemaker in California. You’ll have a pretty girl to pal around with. We’ll never have to smell carbolic and dead sweat again. We’ll be civilized, Daniel. Do you know what that means? This…this hell we’ve lived through…we’ve earned this!”
Daniel was silent, but his head dipped ever so slightly in agreement. Reuben always managed to make sense out of chaos. “I think I’ll be out of here in another couple of days. I’m with you, pal. Tell Madame Mickey I’d be honored to accept her invitation. Did I tell you she brought me flowers from her greenhouse again yesterday?”
Reuben guffawed. “She calls it her hothouse. I can tell you—”
“Never mind,” Daniel said hastily.
Reuben didn’t know why he felt the need to stake out the boundaries of his commitment to Daniel. To take care of Daniel, to watch over him, somehow enabled him to make sense of his own life. Daniel was good, he was honest, and he was honorable, and if Reuben had anything to do with it, he would stay that way. He reached down to tousle Daniel’s pale blond hair.
“When you’re discharged, Madame Mickey will pick us up in her motorcar. She’s promised to teach me to drive.”
“How old is this Bebe?” Daniel asked. It grated on him at times that he’d never had a girlfriend, while he knew that Reuben had had scores and had been intimate with all of them. After all, Reuben was a virile man. Bebe was probably ten years old. Reuben still thought of Daniel as a boy. Christ, he’d gone through the war the same as Reuben had; that should qualify him as a man. He waited, holding his breath, for Reuben’s reply. Think of me as a man, he pleaded silently, so I can think of myself the same way.
“Fifteen going on sixteen. Same way you’re seventeen going on eighteen. I understand she’s a beauty. If you can’t think of anything else to do, you can talk her to death.”
Daniel flushed again and changed the subject. “Does this country estate have a library?”
“Don’t they all?” Reuben answered blithely. “I haven’t been to the château yet, but Madame Mickey’s told me a lot about it. When she’d make her rounds at the hospital we talked, sometimes for hours. The château has everything. We’re going there to live again.” Reuben’s heavy voice conveyed the somberness of his memories. “The trenches are something we’ll never have to see again. Shrapnel-seeded meadows, the jagged rubble heap of La Boiselle, the frostbite, the chilblains, jaundice—it’s all behind us. No more cold nights with just each other for warmth. We won’t have to carry a rifle and we won’t ever have to kill anyone again. We can bury our savagery here, outside the doors of this hospital, the day you’re discharged. We’ll be Daniel and Reuben again, starting fresh.”
Daniel felt Reuben’s embarrassment at his outburst. He couldn’t remember Reuben ever showing so much emotion, even when they were first getting to know each other those many months before in boot camp, when he talked of being a boy from Brooklyn, shunted around from one family member to another until he struck out on his own and never looked back.
“Well,” Daniel began, clearing his throat, “so she’s gonna teach you to drive, hey? I bet that’s not all she’s going to teach you.” He grinned beneath his bandages.
This time, Reuben noticed, Daniel didn’t blush at all.
“Hey, boy! Rest. I’ll see you tomorrow.” With a wave of his hand, he left his friend and found himself smiling as he threaded his way through the aisles of cots and wounded men to the great heavy doors that led to the street.
Daniel lay quietly for a long time after Reuben left. If Reuben said he would be able to see again, then he would see. If Reuben said his shoulder would knit, it would knit. He was alive, and Reuben had both their lives under control. All this misery would become a memory. His thoughts came to life as the moans and groans of the other men in the makeshift ward faded. Thank God for Reuben.
They’d been in boot camp together since day one, from the first he had recognized a kindred spirit in Reuben. Then they’d arrived in France and tasted the first bitter dregs of day-to-day combat. At night, groups of men had huddled together, speaking of their homes, their families, their sweethearts. They would ramble on and show pictures, and eyes would embarrassingly tear and voices break. Daniel would see Reuben’s expression change, become vacant. Hardened. The tall, handsome man would walk from the group determinedly, and Daniel would join him. They would talk about their own childhoods, about their lack of any kind of home that could compare with what the other men had.
Daniel was an orphan, a fact he’d learned early on, scrambling in the orphanage for scraps of bread or fleeting attention. Reuben’s mother had died giving birth to him, and then his father had died when he was six. After that he was passed from one relative to another, winding up with an aunt, a destitute woman who had made it clear that with six children of her own to care for, she had no time for Reuben. Wherever they lived, Reuben and Daniel had felt extraneous. They were outsiders. Neither of them could remember a cozy Thanksgiving dinner in the bosom of their family—parents, grandparents, sisters, or brothers.
The war had brought them together. In the trenches they became brothers to each other while the bitter realities of war embraced them in a cloak of death and destruction. Although there were times when it seemed life offered little more than a thousand ways to die, they’d survived by sharing rations and fears, past emotional traumas, and then almost identical physical pain—gassed and blinded in the same overwhelming moment.
Daniel shifted on his cot, where he lay bandaged and broken. The one question he tried to push far away, to the very back of his brain, whirled in his mind. Will I be blind? Forever? A recent night in the trenches flashed through his mind. He could smell it and feel it, and his skin began to crawl. Speechless and trembling as the world crashed around them, they sat ankle deep in the muck, waiting out an unusually fearful blitz. Then he remembered the body of that boy landing on him, bleeding, open and steaming at the same time, and the smell of gunpowder and burning flesh. When Reuben had pulled him out they had stared at each other and voiced the same overpowering fear: that they