What the Heart Knows. Margaret DaleyЧитать онлайн книгу.
with nothing said, then he shrugged and mumbled, “Out. Walking.”
Kathleen forced herself to take a deep, calming breath, but still her stomach muscles remained clenched in a tight knot. “You’re supposed to write me a note telling me where you’re going.”
He lifted his shoulders in another shrug. “Forgot.” He resumed his progress up the stairs.
Kathleen counted to ten, then twenty, but nothing soothed her shredded nerves. She couldn’t shake the feeling something was terribly wrong. Watching her son disappear down the hall, she sensed Jared standing behind her. She whirled. “I’m beginning to wonder if he can put a sentence of more than a word or two together anymore.” She tried to smile, but it wavered about the corners of her mouth and vanished almost immediately.
“I’ve thought that many times while having a conversation with my children. I know they can because I’ve heard them with their friends. But sometimes talking to them is like pulling teeth.”
“At least he’s home and I don’t have to go out searching for him. I used not to have to worry like this, but lately, especially since the talent show, I don’t know what to think when it comes to Mark.”
Jared took a deep breath. “I think the coffee is ready. Why don’t we sit and talk over a cup?”
The aroma of coffee teased her senses. The idea of sharing a quiet, adult conversation with Jared roused her interest. “That sounds great. I can bring our coffee into the living room if you want.”
“Let’s drink it in the kitchen. I always think of that room as the heart of a house.”
With one last glance toward the top of the stairs, Kathleen led the way. “I like that. I probably spend more time in here than any room if I don’t count the hours I sleep.”
“When I was growing up, that was an important part of the house. Now I hardly set foot in my kitchen. Mrs. Davis prefers us staying out when she is creating her meals. At least she’s a good cook. I wish Hannah could learn to cook.”
“I could show her some dishes if she wants to learn.”
Jared grinned, deep lines fanning out from the corners of his eyes, indicating the man was used to smiling a lot. “I don’t think she has thought much about it. I just think it’s something she should know.”
“But not Terry?”
“Actually I think he should learn, too, but I don’t see Mrs. Davis being their teacher.”
But Jared saw Kathleen teaching them. He should back off from her right now, but he couldn’t. Hannah needed someone like Kathleen in her life—even if it was only as a friend. He couldn’t deny his child that. He would just have to be extra careful to protect his own heart.
“When I take Hannah shopping, I’ll see if she would like to have some lessons.”
“Maybe I could meet you two for lunch.”
“Hannah would love that. I thought Thursday would be a good day to go.” Kathleen removed two mugs from the cabinet and poured coffee into each.
“Are you two going to the mall?”
Kathleen nodded, handing Jared his mug.
“Then I’ll meet you at the south entrance at noon and we can go to lunch.” Taking a seat at the glass table, Jared settled back and scanned the room. “I like this. Warm. Inviting.”
“It was the first room I put together. I like to cook and it was so hard digging around in boxes trying to find what I needed.” Kathleen did her own survey of the kitchen, relaxing the tension that had gripped her ever since she had discovered Mark gone. The forest greens and deep reds of the plaid wallpaper added a richness to the walnut-finished cabinets. The light brown tiles that covered the floor lent a cool refreshing feel to the room. “I think this was what sold me on the house. It’s large and open with plenty of windows to let in the sunshine.”
Jared sipped his coffee, his gaze locking with hers over the mug’s rim. “I can’t believe you got your house in order in two weeks. I can still remember when we moved to Crystal Springs. It took us months to feel at home in our house.”
“I can be a very determined lady when I set my mind to a job. I need order in my surroundings. I’m much happier that way and learned long ago it was easier on me to keep things in their place.”
Her words brought back a memory that lambasted Jared. He put down his mug with more force than he intended, its sound against the glass piercing the quiet.
“What’s wrong?”
Jared closed his eyes for a few seconds, the memory still ingrained in his mind. When he looked at Kathleen, he saw the worry etched into her features. “I just thought of something that happened once, that’s all.”
Kathleen didn’t say anything, and her silence prodded him to fill the void. For some reason it felt right to talk to her even though he hadn’t discussed Alice’s problem in a long time, hadn’t wanted to re-hash something he’d rather forget.
“My wife hated housework, so one weekend I decided to help her. We had only been married a few years. That weekend I discovered one liquor bottle stashed behind the cleaning supplies under the sink and another one on the top shelf of the linen closet.” He paused, still sharply remembering the cold feel of the bottle in his hands as he had shown it to her. “I hadn’t realize Alice even drank. She knew how I felt about it.”
“So she kept it hidden from you?”
“Not after I confronted her with the two bottles. From then on she was open about her drinking.” Memories of watching his wife empty a bottle into a large glass then down it shuddered through him.
“That had to be hard.”
“Yes.” Jared took another sip of his coffee, cupping the mug to mask the quivering in his hands. “I’ve seen what alcohol can do to a person, medically speaking. In some ways I wished I had remained ignorant of her problem.”
“Ignorance is bliss?”
He placed his mug on the mat, this time being careful and said in a tightly controlled voice, “She wouldn’t let me help her. There were times my frustration level was unbearable. It’s hard watching someone self-destruct.”
Kathleen slid her hand across the cool glass and covered his. “How did you handle the stress?”
“I worked harder and longer at building my practice. By that time we had moved to Crystal Springs. And when I wasn’t working, I threw myself into the activities at the church we attended. If I hadn’t, I don’t know how I would have made it, especially when Alice became pregnant with Terry unexpectedly. I didn’t want any more children. I had seen the effects of alcohol on unborn babies.”
Kathleen squeezed his hand, her heart swelling. “Terry seems fine.”
“He is.” Jared blew out a long breath. “Thankfully Alice agreed to go into rehab while she was pregnant. Everything seemed fine for a while, but a few months after Terry was born, she started drinking again and was killed in a drunk driving accident.”
Tears stung Kathleen’s eyes, a lump lodged in her throat. “I’m sorry.”
Jared blinked, slipping his hand from hers. He straightened, a flush to his face. “I didn’t mean to tell you that. It’s not something I like to relive.”
“Maybe you should. It’s important to work through our feelings in order to get beyond them.”
“That life is behind me.”
The look of doubt in his eyes belied the force of his words. “Is it?”
He held her gaze for a few seconds, then glanced away. “Yes. Living through it once was enough.” He rose in one fluid motion. “I’d better be going. Tomorrow will be a long day.”
Kathleen