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William Shakespeare - Ultimate Collection: Complete Plays & Poetry in One Volume. William ShakespeareЧитать онлайн книгу.

William Shakespeare - Ultimate Collection: Complete Plays & Poetry in One Volume - William Shakespeare


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EVANS

       He’s welcome.

       [Sings]

       To shallow rivers, to whose falls —

       Heaven prosper the right! — What weapons is he?

       SIMPLE

       No weapons, sir. There comes my master, Master Shallow, and another gentleman, from Frogmore, over the stile, this way.

       EVANS

       Pray you give me my gown; or else keep it in your arms. [Reads in a book.]

       [Enter PAGE, SHALLOW, and SLENDER.]

       SHALLOW

       How now, Master Parson! Good morrow, good Sir Hugh. Keep a gamester from the dice, and a good student from his book, and it is wonderful.

       SLENDER

       [Aside] Ah, sweet Anne Page!

       PAGE

       ‘Save you, good Sir Hugh!

       EVANS

       Pless you from his mercy sake, all of you!

       SHALLOW

       What, the sword and the word! Do you study them both, Master Parson?

       PAGE

       And youthful still, in your doublet and hose, this raw rheumatic day!

       EVANS

       There is reasons and causes for it.

       PAGE

       We are come to you to do a good office, Master Parson.

       EVANS

       Fery well; what is it?

       PAGE

       Yonder is a most reverend gentleman, who, belike having received wrong by some person, is at most odds with his own gravity and patience that ever you saw.

       SHALLOW

       I have lived fourscore years and upward; I never heard a man of his place, gravity, and learning, so wide of his own respect.

       EVANS

       What is he?

       PAGE

       I think you know him: Master Doctor Caius, the renowned French physician.

       EVANS

       Got’s will and His passion of my heart! I had as lief you would tell me of a mess of porridge.

       PAGE

       Why?

       EVANS

       He has no more knowledge in Hibbocrates and Galen, — and he is a knave besides; a cowardly knave as you would desires to be acquainted withal.

       PAGE

       I warrant you, he’s the man should fight with him.

       SLENDER

       [Aside] O, sweet Anne Page!

       SHALLOW

       It appears so, by his weapons. Keep them asunder; here comes Doctor Caius.

       [Enter HOST, CAIUS, and RUGBY.]

       PAGE

       Nay, good Master Parson, keep in your weapon.

       SHALLOW

       So do you, good Master Doctor.

       HOST

       Disarm them, and let them question; let them keep their limbs whole and hack our English.

       CAIUS

       I pray you, let-a me speak a word with your ear: verefore will you not meet-a me?

       EVANS

       [Aside to CAIUS] Pray you use your patience; in good time.

       CAIUS

       By gar, you are de coward, de Jack dog, John ape.

       EVANS

       [Aside to CAIUS] Pray you, let us not be laughing-stogs to other men’s humours; I desire you in friendship, and I will one way or other make you amends.

       [Aloud] I will knog your urinals about your knave’s cogscomb for missing your meetings and appointments.

       CAIUS

       Diable! — Jack Rugby, — mine Host de Jarretiere, — have I not stay for him to kill him? Have I not, at de place I did appoint?

       EVANS

       As I am a Christians soul, now, look you, this is the place appointed. I’ll be judgment by mine host of the Garter.

       HOST

       Peace, I say, Gallia and Gaullia; French and Welsh, soul-curer and body-curer!

       CAIUS

       Ay, dat is very good; excellent!

       HOST

       Peace, I say! Hear mine host of the Garter. Am I politic? am I subtle? am I a Machiavel? Shall I lose my doctor? No; he gives me the potions and the motions. Shall I lose my parson, my priest, my Sir Hugh? No; he gives me the proverbs and the no-verbs. Give me thy hand, terrestrial; so; — give me thy hand, celestial; so. Boys of art, I have deceived you both; I have directed you to wrong places; your hearts are mighty, your skins are whole, and let burnt sack be the issue. Come, lay their swords to pawn. Follow me, lads of peace; follow, follow, follow.

       SHALLOW

       Trust me, a mad host! — Follow, gentlemen, follow.

       SLENDER

       [Aside] O, sweet Anne Page!

       [Exeunt SHALLOW, SLENDER, PAGE, and HOST.]

       CAIUS

       Ha, do I perceive dat? Have you make-a de sot of us, ha, ha?

       EVANS

       This is well; he has made us his vlouting-stog. I desire you that we may be friends; and let us knog our prains together to be revenge on this same scall, scurvy, cogging companion, the host of the Garter.

       CAIUS

       By gar, with all my heart. He promise to bring me where is Anne Page; by gar, he deceive me too.

       EVANS

       Well, I will smite his noddles. Pray you follow.

       [Exeunt.]

      SCENE II. A street in Windsor

       [Enter MISTRESS PAGE and ROBIN.]

       MRS. PAGE

       Nay, keep your way, little gallant: you were wont to be a follower, but now you are a leader. Whether had you rather lead mine eyes, or eye your master’s heels?

       ROBIN

       I had rather, forsooth, go before you like a man than follow him like a dwarf.

       MRS. PAGE

       O! you are a flattering boy: now I see you’ll be a courtier.

       [Enter FORD.]

       FORD

       Well met, Mistress Page. Whither go you?

       MRS. PAGE

       Truly, sir, to see your wife. Is she at home?

       FORD

       Ay; and as idle as she may hang together, for want of company. I think, if your husbands were dead, you two would marry.

       MRS. PAGE

       Be sure of that — two other husbands.

       FORD

       Where had you this pretty weathercock?

       MRS. PAGE

       I cannot tell what the dickens his name is my husband had him of. What do you call your knight’s name, sirrah?

       ROBIN

       Sir John Falstaff.

       FORD

       Sir John Falstaff!

      


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