Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. Avy JosephЧитать онлайн книгу.
ANGER/RAGE VERSUS ANNOYANCE
Unhealthy Negative Emotion | What the belief is about | Healthy Negative Emotion |
---|---|---|
Anger or rage | Loss or failure | Sadness |
How you think | How you think | |
You exaggerate the actions of the person who has broken your personal rule. | You are balanced about the intention behind the thing that was done. | |
You think the other person's intentions were malicious. | You don't see malice. | |
You are right and the other person is definitely wrong. | You are open to being wrong. | |
You can't see the other person's point of view. | You can listen to the other person's point of view. | |
You think of how you can get your revenge. | You do not think of seeking revenge. | |
What you do or what you feel like doing | What you do or what you feel like doing | |
You physically attack. | You talk and behave in an assertive manner but with the right intent. | |
You verbally attack. | You ask the other person to make changes but you don't demand it. | |
You pay them back somehow, e.g. by ignoring them or staying silent. You recruit allies against the other person. |
HURT VERSUS SORROW
Unhealthy Negative Emotion | What the belief is about | Healthy Negative Emotion |
---|---|---|
Hurt | Someone has treated you badly. You think you deserve to be treated better. | Sorrow |
How you think | How you think | |
You exaggerate the unfairness of your treatment. | You think in a balanced way about the unfairness. | |
You think the other person does not care about you. | You do not think the other person does not care about you. | |
You think of yourself as unlovable or misunderstood. | You do not think of yourself as unlovable or misunderstood. | |
You remember the other times when you felt hurt. | You don't think about the other times when you felt hurt. | |
The other person must understand and make amends first. | You don't insist the other person has to make the first move. | |
What you do or what you feel like doing | What you do or what you feel like doing | |
You sulk and shut down. | You talk about how you feel in order to persuade the other person to behave more fairly. | |
You pick on the other person without telling them why. | ||
GUILT VERSUS REMORSE
Unhealthy Negative Emotion | What the belief is about | Healthy Negative Emotion |
---|---|---|
Guilt | You have broken a moral code or the feelings of a significant person were hurt. | Remorse |
How you think | How you think | |
You have definitely committed a sin. | You think about what you did and put it in context before you make a judgement. | |
You think you are more responsible |