One Winter's Sunset: The Christmas Baby Surprise / Marry Me under the Mistletoe / Snowflakes and Silver Linings. Rebecca WintersЧитать онлайн книгу.
Are you sure you can’t work it out?”
“I wish we could, I really do. But it’s over.” She let out a long breath. “I still love him. Heck, I probably always will. But we just want different things out of life.”
Joe flashed her a grin. “It seemed like you were on the right track last night at dinner.”
“I thought so, too. And in a lot of ways, we are. But not in the most important ways, so I told him last night that I’m done for good.” Emily tucked her hair behind her ears. It didn’t seem right to feel this sad on such a pretty day. She had something wonderful to look forward to, and she needed to focus on that, not the problems that would soon be in her past. “I’m just tired of waiting for him to be ready to start a family and to put family first.”
“Ah, that explains a lot.” Joe grabbed a water bottle out of the cooler at his feet and took a long sip. “Did Cole say why he doesn’t want to have kids?”
“He keeps saying we haven’t done this or that. Traveled enough. Been together long enough.” She exhaled. “If you ask me, they’re all excuses.”
“If you ask me, I think you’re right.” Joe tipped the bottle in her direction and arched a brow. “The question is why a smart man like Cole would make excuses like that.”
Emily threw up her hands. “I don’t know.”
Joe nodded. His gaze went off to the distance for a moment as if he was trying to decide whether to say the next words. Finally, he returned his attention to Emily. “Did you ever meet Cole’s parents?”
“Once. A long time ago, while we were still dating. Then his dad died and his mom moved to Arizona, and... Gosh, I can’t believe it’s been that long since we’ve seen his mom.” She didn’t have the best relationship with her parents, but at least she saw them for holidays and talked to them once a week. Cole, however, didn’t call very often and had never wanted to go to Arizona. Yet another aspect of family he kept down the list from his hours at work. That alone should have told her where their child would rank.
“I’ve known Cole a long, long time,” Joe said. “And I knew his parents, too. Let’s just say he didn’t have the ideal childhood.”
“He never talks about it.” There were a few conversational topics that Cole steered away from. His childhood was one of them. She’d sensed it hadn’t been happy, something she could relate to, and had never pushed him to open up. Had she been avoiding the conversations that would have brought them closer? Had her efforts to keep the peace been part of the problem? “What happened?”
“His father was a tyrant, to put it mildly. Nothing Cole ever did was good enough. Probably why he keeps on trying to be better, even when he’s already the best in his industry. And his mother, well, she buried her head in a bottle and ignored everything around her.” Joe shook his head. “Cole pretty much raised himself and his little brother. He told me a hundred times that he never wanted to have kids and treat them like that.”
“But he’s not like either one of them. Why is he still afraid of repeating their mistakes?”
Joe shrugged. “You’d have to ask him.”
“Maybe.” Emily started to head away. She didn’t remind Joe that with the divorce looming, there’d be no conversations with Cole about his past. Done meant done, and she had to move on before she let herself get suckered back into riding that emotional roller coaster.
“Emily?” Joe said. She pivoted back. “Cole might not be the best at showing how he feels, or hell, even saying it, but believe me, that man loves you more than anything in the world. Keep an open heart.”
That man loves you more than anything in the world. How she wanted to believe that. But she thought of him answering the phone last night, and knew there were things Cole loved more than her. And always would. “I thought the expression was keep an open mind.”
“When it comes to Cole, an open heart’s a better idea.” Joe gave her a grin, then got back to work on the window.
Emily nodded, not making any promises, then strode down the dock, sat on the end and let her feet dangle above the deep blue water. The breeze skipped across the water, making it look like corrugated denim. Beautiful, serene.
She fingered the rock in her pocket and thought back to the day the four of them had found the rocks, scattered at the edge of the lake. The stones were so similar that the girls had taken it as a sign that they needed to keep them and make them special. So they’d stood by the water, holding hands and promising to always follow their dreams.
It had taken Emily a while, but she was doing that now. She wondered if Andrea and Casey were doing the same thing, or if they were stuck in Neutral like Emily had been for far too long. Oh, how she missed the other Gingerbread Girls. Maybe a talk with her friends would take her mind off Cole, and all that Joe had said.
Emily tugged out her cell, then dialed Andrea. When her old friend answered, nostalgia filled Emily’s heart. She could think of no one better to share this moment with than one of the other Gingerbread Girls. “Guess where I am?”
Andrea paused a moment, thinking. “On the end of the dock, watching for the Loch Ness monster to show up.”
Emily laughed. “Guilty as charged. I can’t believe we thought Nessie could really be here.”
“Didn’t keep us from swimming. Heck, our parents had to drag us out of the water most days.”
So many memories, wrapped up in this magical place and those endless summers they had spent here. Such a blessing that their parents had loved this place just as much, bringing the families together summer after summer. The Gingerbread Girls had bonded, and been off all day, swimming, playing badminton, chasing boys...just being young and free. “We did have a lot of fun here.”
“My best memories are all in that place.” Andrea sighed. “Is Carol still planning on selling?”
Emily hadn’t brought up the subject with Carol because she didn’t want to hear the answer. She hoped that once the building was fixed, the innkeeper would change her mind. “I’m not sure. Cole has been doing a lot of repairs—”
“He’s still there?”
Emily tossed a leaf into the water and watched it float away. “He wants a second chance. He keeps telling me things will be different.”
“Maybe they will. Maybe the separation really changed him. I mean, he’s still there, not at work, right? For a workaholic to take that much time off must mean something. Don’t you think?”
Emily wanted to believe that, but she’d had her hopes dashed a thousand times before. And now, with the baby on the way, and Cole’s insistence that they not add kids into their marriage, she didn’t see a way to make it work, regardless of how many hours he spent here.
Not to mention there were things about himself that he had shared with Joe and not with her. His wife. If anything told Emily that their relationship wasn’t on solid ground, that did.
“The fundamental differences between us are still there, Andrea,” she said. “Nothing has changed that. I told him I’m moving forward with the divorce.”
“I’m sorry. I know that’s got to be hard on you.”
“I’m okay. One of the things I’m finding by being on my own is that I’m stronger than I thought.” She watched a lone bird skim the surface of the water, elegant and clean, then make a sudden dive for a fish. “Plus, I’m finally writing that book I wanted to write, and being responsible for me and only me. So even if Cole wanted to get back together, I’m not the same Emily I was before.”
“That’s fabulous. And I’ll get to see that for myself when I get out there in a couple weeks.”
“You’re coming? Oh, that’s awesome! It’ll be so great to see you.”
Andrea