His Lover's Little Secret. Andrea LaurenceЧитать онлайн книгу.
me with what?”
“With life, Sabine. If you won’t marry me, let me get you a nice apartment in the city. Wherever you want to live. Let me help pay for Jared’s education. We can enroll him in the best preschool. I can get someone to help around the house. Someone that can cook and clean, even pick up Jared from school if you want to keep working.”
“And why would you want to do that? What you’re suggesting is incredibly expensive.”
“Maybe, but it’s worth it to me. It’s an investment in my child. Making your life easier will make you a happier, more relaxed mother to our son. He can spend more time playing and learning than sitting on the subway. And admittedly, having you in Manhattan will make it easier for me to see Jared more often.”
He could see the conflict in Sabine’s pale green eyes. She was struggling. She was proud and wouldn’t admit it, but raising Jared on her own had to be difficult. Kids weren’t cheap. They took time and money and effort. She’d already sacrificed her art. But convincing her to accept his offering would take time.
He knew Sabine better than she wanted to admit. She didn’t want to be seen as one of those women who moved up in social status by calculated breeding. Jared had been an accident, of that he was certain. Judging by the expression on Sabine’s face when she opened the door to her apartment, she would’ve rather had any man’s son but his.
“Let’s take this one step at a time, please,” Sabine said, echoing his thoughts. There was a pained expression on her face that made him think there was more than just pride holding her back.
“What do you mean?”
“You’ve gone from having no kids to having a toddler and very nearly a fiancée in two hours’ time. That’s a big change for you, and for both Jared and me. Let’s not uproot our lives so quickly.” She sighed and gripped his hand. “Let’s get the DNA results in, so there are no questions or doubts. Then we can introduce the idea of you to Jared and tell our families. From there, maybe we move into the city to be closer to you. But let’s make these decisions over weeks and months, not minutes.”
She glanced down at the screen on her cell phone. “I’ve got to get inside and set up.”
“Okay.” Gavin got out of the car and came around to open her door and help her out.
“I have tomorrow off. If you can make an appointment for DNA testing, call or text me and we’ll meet you there. My number is the same. Do you still have it?”
He did. He’d very nearly dialed it about a hundred times in the weeks after she’d left. He’d been too proud to go through with the call. A hundred people had drifted in and out of his life, but Sabine leaving had caught him by surprise and it stung. He’d wanted to fight, wanted to call her and convince her she was wrong about them. But she wanted to go and he let her.
Now he could kick himself for not manning up and telling her he wanted her and didn’t care what others thought about it. That he would make the time for her. Maybe then he would’ve been there to hear his son’s heartbeat in the doctor’s office, his first cries and his first words. Maybe then the mother of his child wouldn’t look at him with wary eyes and laugh off his proposal of marriage like a joke.
He made a point of pulling out his phone and confirming it so she wouldn’t think he knew for certain. “I do.”
Sabine nodded and slowly started walking backward across the grass. Even after all this time apart, it felt awkward to part like strangers without a hug or a kiss goodbye. They were bonded for a lifetime now, and yet he had never felt as distant from her as he did when she backed away.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, then,” she said.
“Tomorrow,” he repeated.
He watched as she regarded him for a moment at a distance. There was a sadness in her expression that he didn’t like. The Sabine he remembered was a vibrant artist with a lust for life and experience. She had jerked him out of his blah corporate existence, demanded he live his life, not just go through the motions. Sabine was nothing like what he was supposed to have but absolutely everything he needed. He’d regretted every day since she’d walked out of his life.
Now, he regretted it more than ever, and not just because of his son. The sad, weary woman walking away from him was just a shadow of the person he once knew. And he hated that.
The outdoor lights kicked on, lighting the shimmer of tears in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Gavin,” she said before spinning on her heels and disappearing through the doors of the community center.
She was sorry. And so was he.
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