The Dare Collection: July 2018. Nicola MarshЧитать онлайн книгу.
don’t know if there’s any fixing this.” She walked back to the couch and sat down, waiting for Becka to join her before she started in. Allie detailed how far behind they were on bills, how she’d been borrowing from her own income to supplement both the gym and the shelter, how she was almost drained dry.
How she’d told Roman no even though he’d offered her a potential way out.
“Well, yeah.” Becka nodded. “He didn’t give you much in the way of assurances, and I get why you said no.” Before Allie could relax, she continued. “What I don’t get is why this is the first time I’m hearing about all this.”
“I thought I could handle it.” Even when she’d realized she couldn’t, putting that burden on someone else went against everything Allie was. She was the problem solver, and she knew she could depend on herself. Other people depended on her—she didn’t depend on other people. She didn’t know how to reach out when she was in trouble.
Becka gave her a look. “You know, it’s not the worst thing in the world to ask for help. You’re allowed to not be perfect.”
“I know I’m not perfect.”
She snorted. “But you don’t know how to lean on other people. As your best friend, I’m all about blindly hating anyone you hate, but I have a question and I want you to answer it honestly.”
Even knowing where this was going, she couldn’t help nodding. “Okay.”
“Did you even stop to consider for a second that maybe Roman was on the up-and-up? That maybe he cared about you and was telling the truth about his investor and he only wanted to help?” She held up a hand. “I mean, the man is not a saint. He went after this account because he knew it would make his investor happy, and he didn’t really care about what you wanted before he met you—but that doesn’t mean that the investor is an evil mastermind who wants to destroy everything you’ve worked toward. Did you ask Roman if you were going to be able to stay on in any capacity?”
“No.” Heat climbed her chest and throat to settle in her face. Embarrassment. “He wanted me to compromise on everything and just have faith that he wasn’t screwing me. I just...reacted.”
Becka nodded. “I mean, I’m not saying you were 100 percent in the wrong. He played that poorly from beginning to end. But I also think that maybe, just maybe, you reacted instead of thinking it through. I know you want to be able to do this all yourself, but there’s no shame in letting someone else share your vision—and help you realize it.”
She took a slow breath. “All those women are depending on me to help them.”
“Whoa. Slow down there, Wonder Woman. Those women are grateful for a safe space, yes, but they’re not helpless. They’re not children who need you to see to their every need. You can’t put all that on your shoulders.” She leaned forward. “Let’s be honest here for a second, okay?”
Allie managed a half smile. “We weren’t being honest before now?”
“You know what I mean. I love the shit out of you, but you can be bullheaded to a clinical degree. Roman scared you. He made you feel things and he offered you something you want desperately but are afraid to take because it might blow up in your face. I get that. I do. But I also think you latched on to any reason why it wouldn’t work and just ran with it, ignoring any indication that you might be—just maybe—dead wrong.”
She didn’t want to admit that. Roman was as bullheaded as she was—if not more so. She couldn’t afford to show weakness because he’d steamroll her.
Except by not showing weakness, she’d put them in a position where it was all or nothing. There was no compromise because she hadn’t tried to compromise. She’d just turned him down and cut things off because it was easier than putting herself out there and trying. Becka’s words wouldn’t smart so much if they didn’t have more than a grain of truth in them. “Damn it, you’re right.”
“I often am.” Becka slouched back onto the couch and pulled her legs up to her chest. “So, to simplify—you like Roman a whole hell of a lot, and you’re in trouble with the gym—the kind of trouble an investor would solve, but only the right investor.”
“That about sums it up.” She twisted a lock of hair around her finger. “I guess if I had the right investor, it wouldn’t be hard to sign over control—at least partial control. Someone who has the same vision I do, and who wants the same things.”
“That makes sense.” Becka grinned. “Good thing we know someone with a whole list of people wanting to invest in start-up companies that have promise. I imagine if you went to Roman with a counteroffer, he’d fall all over himself to give you whatever you want.”
Since Allie couldn’t imagine a scenario where Roman fell all over himself, she just nodded. She could go to a different person to make this connection, but that seemed the height of stupidity—and cowardice. Facing Roman and admitting that she was wrong shouldn’t be the end of the world. It wouldn’t be comfortable, but what if he really had been serious about giving them a real shot? She’d spend the rest of her life wondering if she’d missed the love of her life because she was too stubborn to ask for help. “I should call him, huh?”
“If you think so.”
She considered it for a full thirty seconds. “I’m going to shower and then I’m going to go find him.”
“That’s my girl!”
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