The Lawman's Secret Son. Lorraine BeattyЧитать онлайн книгу.
the sleeping boy to collect herself. Seth shifted beside her, sending a whiff of tangy aftershave in her direction.
“Contrary to what you might think, I would never abandon a child of mine. If I’d known about Jack, I would have fought to be part of his life.”
She wanted to believe that. She wanted to believe that her first impression of him was the correct one. That he was a nice guy, a man of character. But how did she know for certain? Those kind of men had been absent in her life. It was easier and safer to lump them all into one negative category.
Seth must have read the doubt and confusion in her eyes. He touched her arm lightly, and the contact sent a rush of warmth along her skin, awakening another layer of awareness of the man beside her. At five feet five inches, she wasn’t short, but Seth’s six-foot height and solid build made her feel petite. The kindness in his eyes wrapped around her like a gentle hug.
“I’ll take good care of Jack. You don’t need to worry. We both care about the little guy and want what’s best for him. But it’s going to take some time to sort this out.”
His words eased some of her concern. “I know. I just don’t want him to feel alone.”
“He won’t. I’ll be with him until we get to the bottom of this. And he has you and Leo right next door.”
She wasn’t sure that was a good thing. In a few short hours she’d become entangled with the little boy and drawn into Seth’s life. She turned her attention back to the bed. They stood at the bedroom door watching Jack sleep, both reluctant to leave him alone. Carrie knew she should not get involved in this situation, but that resolve had already started to crumble.
“What if you can’t find her?” She hated to think of what kind of future the child might face if that happened.
Seth sighed. “Let’s not borrow trouble. For now let’s make our little guy happy while we look for answers.”
Our little guy. Their mutual affection for Jack and their desire to help him had bonded them whether she liked it or not. For the immediate future, they were his advocates. She looked into Seth’s eyes and thought she read the same strength and determination there that was inside her. It would be nice to have a partner, someone equally dedicated to the cause.
A small chamber of her heart clicked open, as if suddenly unlocked after years of neglect. She fought back the swell of attraction and the need for connection swirling inside. She couldn’t afford to depend on anyone, not even a man as handsome and kind as Seth. There was too much at stake in her life right now. The pressure in her chest increased, forcing her to take quick breaths. She had to get out of there. Away from Seth. She needed space and time to think.
“I’d better go.” She hurried to the living room, but stopped at the front door when Seth called her name.
“You want me to check with you in the morning and let you know how Jack slept?”
No. She wanted out of this situation. A memory of Jack scared and abandoned on her porch tapped into her deep need to help. How could she refuse now that she’d become attached to the little guy? “Yes. That would be nice.” With one last look at Seth, she forced herself to walk away, hurrying across the yard and not stopping until she was safely inside her home.
Curled up on her bed, she took a few deep breaths to calm her anxious mind. Leo hopped up and settled into her lap, and she buried her fingers in the soft, thick fur. Petting Leo always calmed her down. Too bad he couldn’t teach her to be stronger in her convictions.
When would she learn to listen to that warning voice inside when it spoke? She’d told herself not to get involved with Jack’s situation. She’d heard the warning bells before she’d stepped inside Seth’s home and again when he’d called and asked for her help. But she couldn’t turn away from the little boy’s needs.
Dealing with Seth was another matter. Her unexpected attraction to Seth was disturbing. She had closed the door on relationships long ago. She’d seen firsthand how letting your heart rule your head always led to disaster. Especially when you had a past that needed to stay buried.
The memory of Jack snuggled in her arms, his head tucked under her chin as she read the magazine, tapped into a longing she didn’t allow herself to contemplate. A child of her own, a home, a husband. A life she wasn’t entitled to. But, for one second, as they’d stood watching Jack sleep, both of them so full of affection for the boy, it had been as if they were Mom and Dad tucking their child into bed.
That was a life she’d never have. The legacy of her childhood wasn’t something she would inflict on anyone. Not a husband and certainly not a child. No one would understand her childhood or the things she’d done to survive. But that was long ago. She was a different person now. A woman with a renewed mind and heart. She’d accepted the fact that spending her life alone was the price for that transformation, and she didn’t regret it. She had more blessings than she could count, and she would thank the Lord every day of her life.
God had given her a mission to devote herself to helping children trapped in bad situations. She would be their champion the way Mavis Tanner had been hers. Another year of classes and she’d have her degree. All she had to do was stay focused.
She scooted under the covers, tugging them up to her chin and holding Leo tight in her arms. She couldn’t afford to be distracted by a lovable little boy and a man with eyes filled with warmth and tenderness.
* * *
Carrie took another bite of her cereal, the hungry birds gathered around the feeder outside her breakfast-room window providing her morning entertainment. She’d slept late because she’d spent most of the night replaying last night’s events over in her mind.
She’d finally fallen asleep, but even her dreams had been filled with images of being alone, lost in the dark and being chased down shadowed rain-slicked streets. All old subconscious fears born of her own troubled past.
Still, she couldn’t help wondering how Jack had fared after they’d settled him in bed last night. Glancing out the window again, she saw Seth and Jack walking toward the truck. The group of cottages where she lived was known as Collinstown, built by a former logging company in the 1920s to house their employees. The driveways were positioned off an alleyway in the back, leaving the front yards facing the tree-lined streets and the park in the center of the little neighborhood.
Her insides warmed as she watched the man and child. Jack was still holding his metal truck tightly in his hand, but Seth held the other. She wondered where they were going this morning.
A jolt of realization seized her chest. She darted through the door and jogged across the lawn. “Seth. What are you doing?” Breathless, she stopped at the fence. Jack, already in the backseat of the cab, waved at her from the window.
Seth’s dark brows arched when he looked at her. “We’re going to pick up a few things.”
“But he needs a car seat.”
A muscle in his jaw flexed, then his mouth lifted at one corner. “Well, I checked the cupboard and I was fresh out of kids’ car seats. Unless you have one I could borrow?”
“Of course not. I don’t have kids.”
He leaned toward her, a sardonic grin on his face. “Neither did I. Until last night.”
Jack waved at her from the window of the truck and pointed downward. Leo had come outside to join them. “But you have to keep him safe.”
Crossing his arms over his chest, he nodded thoughtfully. “I considered letting him ride in the truck bed, but it’s too cold for that.”
“You can’t be serious...” The smirk on his face stopped her protest.
He grinned and took a step closer. “Stop worrying. I’m going to strap him nice and tight in the backseat, drive very carefully to the store and get him a car seat. Is that the right answer?”
Her cheeks warmed and she took a step back. “Sorry. I just