Innocent Cinderella. Julia JamesЧитать онлайн книгу.
God, she thought, wanting to cry. Oh, God.
She didn’t look at him. Her voice was a stranger’s. ‘You’re overlooking the alternative. There—there doesn’t have to be a baby at all.’
‘I’m overlooking nothing,’ he returned shortly. ‘And you’re not going down that path, Marin, not even if I have to chain you to my wrist until it’s too late. Whatever they may say, it’s not an easy option. And we’re not taking the risk.’
‘But we can’t be married, either.’ She felt herself shrinking into her corner of the sofa. ‘We—we hardly know each other.’
‘Not in terms of weeks, months or years, perhaps,’he agreed. His mouth twisted ruefully. ‘But in one important area we’ve proved we’re entirely compatible, if a little careless.’
‘I told you—I’d been drinking. I—I didn’t realise what I was doing.’
‘Well, you’re sober now,’ he said softly. He slipped off his jacket, threw it over the arm of the sofa. Undid his tie. ‘Why don’t we adjourn to the bedroom and put your interesting theory to the test?’
‘No!’ The word choked out of her. ‘Don’t you dare touch me.’
His brows drew together. ‘As I remarked just now, how quickly life can change,’ he said, half to himself. ‘I must ask Graham where he gets his booze. It must be amazing stuff to have managed to overcome, even for a few hours, your aversion to me.’
‘So I made a terrible mistake,’ she went on hoarsely, ignoring his loaded comment. ‘That’s no reason to wreck the rest of my life.’
He was silent for a moment. ‘No,’ he said at last. ‘And for that I’m more sorry than you can imagine. I should, of course, have taken more care of you. Protected you from any consequences. I blame myself entirely.’
He sighed abruptly. ‘But at least I can guarantee that your future sufferings will be endured in a reasonable degree of comfort.’
‘Am I supposed to find that reassuring?’ she asked bitterly.
He shrugged. ‘What else can I tell you? I’m healthy. I don’t smoke, don’t do drugs, and have never, in spite of some intense provocation, lifted my hand to a woman. Nor,’ he added deliberately, ‘do I drink to excess.’
She flushed angrily. ‘And that’s supposed to be sufficient basis for marriage?’
He was leaning back, totally at ease, long legs stretched out in front of him. ‘It’s a beginning,’ he said. ‘I imagine you don’t require me to go down on one knee and express my undying devotion.’
‘No,’ Marin said stonily. ‘I see no need for unnecessary lies.’
‘But there may be times when you won’t want the unvarnished truth from me, either.’ His gaze was sardonic. ‘Therefore, can I be sure that you won’t probe too deeply if I tell you I’m working late?’
‘No.’ Her throat felt as if a hand had closed round it, crushing the life from her. ‘Although it could make life difficult for Lynne, if she has to back up your story.’
He said flatly, ‘Lynne will no longer be working for me.’
Marin shot out of her corner. ‘You mean, you’re firing her?’ she demanded hotly. ‘God, that’s so unfair. This isn’t her fault.’
‘Oh, calm down,’ Jake said wearily. ‘I’m promoting her to associate director. It includes a salary raise, and a much better benefits package all round. It’s been on the cards for a while, and she thoroughly deserves it, but she’ll be bloody hard to replace. So you’re not the only loser in all this, my sweet.’
‘Don’t call me that!’
‘What would you prefer?’ he enquired mockingly. ‘My darling? My one and only love?’
She sank back against the cushions again. ‘Please,’ she said quietly. ‘Please—don’t.’
‘Then I’ll stick to Marin,’ he said. ‘On one condition—that from now on you call me Jake.’ He added almost casually. ‘You can start practising this afternoon when you meet my mother.’
She stared at him. ‘You have a mother?’
‘Of course,’ he returned. ‘How did you imagine I got here? I think the pair of us have exploded the stork myth pretty thoroughly.’
She said defensively, ‘I didn’t realise you had any relatives.’
‘I also have three godparents, two aunts, an uncle, plus their spouses and various cousins.’ He paused. ‘But I suggest we restrict the wedding to immediate family only.’
She looked down at her hands clenched tightly in her lap. ‘Surely there’s some arrangement other than marriage we could reach—if you really want to acknowledge you’re the baby’s father?’
‘Ah,’he said. ‘ Agreed access in return for child support, I suppose?’ He spoke with a kind of cool implacability. ‘I’m afraid I’m not prepared to settle for a couple of hours every fortnight, depending on your convenience. I’ve watched it happen in the lives of people I know, and it hasn’t been pretty.’
His eyes met hers. ‘My child will have a stable home and be cared for by both its parents. Because the baby’s welfare is all that matters, and our personal feelings have to take second place.’
‘And what happens when the baby’s old enough to realise he’s the only reason that his parents are together?’ Her mouth was dry—so dry. ‘That—that they don’t love each other?’
Jake shrugged. ‘We cross that bridge when we come to it. Or we go back to square one and pretend like crazy.’
‘Beginning with your mother, I suppose?’ Marin bit her lip.
‘No,’ he said. ‘I intend to tell her the truth. She moved out of the Manor to a house on the edge of the village when Dad died three years ago, but she looks after things on the estate for me and acts as my hostess when necessary, so we see a lot of each other.’ He paused, adding flatly, ‘And she’s not easy to fool.’
Manor? Marin thought, startled. Estate? That didn’t sound like the weekend glamour-pad for entertaining his girlfriends that she’d imagined. On the contrary, it held new and even more disturbing implications which she would have to consider later. When she was alone.
She said unevenly, ‘And my mother—my stepfather—what do I say to them?’
‘Tell them what seems best,’ he said. ‘But they could find the situation easier to accept if you were able to convince them that ours was a love match instead of a case of force majeure.
‘And you might try that same approach to Sadie,’ he added. ‘She’s now the housekeeper at the Manor, but she used to be my nanny, and she doesn’t mince her words when she decides I’ve overstepped the mark. However, she has a romantic soul, and might be slightly mollified if she thought we’d been carried away by our mutual passion—even though it won’t spare me the tongue-lashing of the century.’
‘And for how long would I be expected to maintain this farce?’ Marin felt as if she was dying inside but she managed a flash of her old spirit.
‘I’d say until I allow my obvious and unforgivable failings as a husband to destroy the glow of married bliss,’ he said cynically. ‘I won’t make you wait too long.’ He gave her a level look. ‘So, do I take it my honourable proposal has been accepted? For the baby’s sake?’
She was silent for a moment, then she said very quietly, ‘Yes—for the baby. But for no other reason. I want to make that totally clear.’
He shrugged. ‘As daylight.’
‘But I can’t meet your mother today,’ she went on. ‘I have