Rocky Mountain Daddy. Lois RicherЧитать онлайн книгу.
like your aunts. A dragon lady lives under that big generous smile of hers.” Gabe glanced at her, then back to Eli. “Any trouble?”
“With Francie and Franklyn in charge?” She rolled her eyes. “Not yet, but there will be. Did you read your letter?”
“Didn’t get a chance before I found those two.”
“What are you going to do about Eli?” Olivia was curious to hear his plans.
“Ask the aunts if he can stay here, I guess.” He shrugged at her surprise. “I live in a bunkhouse, Olivia. There’s barely room to turn around let alone fit in a kid. It never mattered before, but—”
“It does now. You need to start looking for a home.” She could see the idea surprised him. “He’s a little boy, Gabe. He’s been pulled from the only place he knew. He needs his own home. With his father.”
“What kind of a home?” He shrugged at her confused look. “I’m clueless. I’ve been saving for my own spread for years, but—”
“Buy it,” she interrupted.
“Can’t. I’ve never found what I want. But even if I had, I have to consider...things.”
“Such as?” Why did she feel he was hesitating?
“Such as—it might be dangerous for a kid from the city to live on a ranch. Maybe a temporary place in town is better.” Gabe’s suddenly narrowed stare made Olivia uncomfortable. “You wouldn’t have time to help me look, would you?”
“Me?” Olivia blinked. “What do I know about finding a home for a little boy?”
“Probably more than me. It doesn’t have to be right away,” Gabe quickly added. “Eli could stay here for a while. Your aunts wouldn’t mind. In fact, it might be better if he settled in here.”
“No, it wouldn’t.” Olivia wasn’t sure why it felt so important to get Eli into a home of his own with his father. Maybe it was because she’d sensed an inner angst in the child. Or maybe it was because at Eli’s age she’d always longed to belong to someone. Or maybe it was Gabe himself.
Granted, she didn’t know him well, but she’d always thought him too easygoing, too laid-back, too prepared to wait for things instead of making them happen, like staying in a bunkhouse instead of getting the spread he obviously wanted.
Kathy had said Eli was almost six. Hadn’t father and son waited long enough?
“Why wouldn’t it be good for him to stay here long-term?” Gabe frowned at her.
“Because though he’s welcome, Eli’s a visitor here. Kids need a place where they feel secure. Being shunted around, not having a permanent parent in his life, nothing to call his own—that’s no way to start off your life together. That boy needs a home of his own, with you, his dad. Pronto.”
“Strong feelings much?” Gabe’s blue eyes twinkled. “So, you’re offering to help?”
She’d fallen right into that. Olivia sighed.
“Fine. I’ll help you look for a place to live, Gabe. But that’s all. I won’t help you decorate it or buy furniture for it or any of that stuff.” As if she had any clue as to how to make a house into a home for a cowboy and a kid. Organizing systems, creating efficiency, that was her specialty. Not helping somebody belong.
“Okay,” the big cowboy agreed easily. “I can always ask salesclerks about furniture.”
Oh, brother.
“This home is for you and Eli. You should make the decisions about it together. You do know I’m leaving soon, probably next week, but for sure no later than the end of June.”
“When do you want to start looking? Tomorrow?” And she’d thought Gabe laid-back. “I’m off in the afternoon.” He looked very eager now.
After her first glance at Eli, Olivia had wanted to help him. But she didn’t do kids. Fear of the past happening again, of being responsible and failing, kept her from interacting with her own nieces and nephews. What was so different about Eli that he made her feel he needed her?
Olivia exhaled. She had no idea why this child tugged at her heart. All she knew was that she had to do what she could. And the sooner she helped Eli, the sooner she’d feel okay about leaving The Haven to get on with building her future. Alone. As usual.
Helping Gabe had nothing to do with it.
“Tomorrow afternoon is good,” she agreed.
* * *
Gabe,
First, I apologize. I should have told you about Eli years ago. But you had your dad and your ranch. Eli was all I had. I guess I wanted to punish you for not making me stay with you, so I kept the two of you apart. That was stupid and selfish. All I did was cheat my son of knowing his father, someone he’s asked about since he first learned to speak. I cheated you of knowing him, too, and I’m so sorry. He’s a wonderful boy, Gabe. So curious, so generous. His heart is so tender. Now he’s hurting, worried that I’m dying, and he’ll be left all alone.
I wish I’d eaten my pride ages ago, but now it’s too late. I’m too ill to come and find you. I’m in hospice and there are days I can hardly lift my head. I can barely hug Eli, so I tell him that I love him and that one day you’ll come for him. I don’t know where you are, Gabe, but I pray that somehow God will bring you and our child together. God is my best friend now. You’re the one who first introduced us, remember? My favorite Bible verse is, “He hath made everything beautiful in His time.” God will do that with you and Eli, I know it. Forget about me and how I ruined things between us and concentrate on this wonderful little boy who needs your love so badly. He needs a dad, too, and I know you’ll be a great father. Love him, Gabe.
While I’ve been ill I had to let my sister care for Eli, but please don’t leave our son with Kathy. He has a tender soul and she’ll crush him, just as she did me at that age. Contact the lawyer on the card I’ve included. On my death you’ll receive permanent custody of Eli. I so wish I would have told you this in person, but since I can’t, this is from my heart. Please, I beg you, love our son. Even if you never forgive me, Gabe, love Eli. He desperately needs you.
Eve
Sitting on his bed in his bunkhouse that evening, Gabe reread Eve’s letter several times. Every time he did, the knot of bitterness inside him wound tighter. Simple for Eve to say she was sorry. She was gone. She didn’t have to face him; she’d never answer for what she’d done. But he’d lost almost six years of his son’s life, six years when he could have watched Eli learn to walk, to talk, call him Daddy, share baby kisses and birthdays.
Forget the past. Focus on Eli, his logical brain ordered. Probably good advice, but Gabe doubted he could ever forget or forgive Eve for what she’d done.
So now what?
Lips pursed, he folded Eve’s letter and slid it back into its envelope. He selected a new envelope and wrote Kathy’s address on it. He filled out a check, signed it and slid it inside. Then he added a note. Use this for whatever you need. A father should be responsible for his kid’s expenses. Better late than never. He sealed the envelope and set it on a shelf, ready to mail.
Eve’s letter went into a small bronze box with a lid that Gabe snapped shut before shoving it into a drawer. Though the letter was hidden from his sight, it felt vividly alive in his seething brain.
Head and heart aching, Gabe went outside and sank onto the step, peering into the half-lit sky. Summer nights in the mountains never really got dark. Sunset and sunrise would meet soon. What would tomorrow hold?
“I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord. Thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you an unexpected end.” That verse had been Gabe’s