The Crimson Tide. Robert W. ChambersЧитать онлайн книгу.
At first the endless petty details exasperated her––a girl fresh from the tremendous tragedy of things where, one after another, empires were crashing amid the conflagration of a continent. And she could not now keep her mind on such wretched little personal matters while her heart battered passionately at her breast, sounding the exciting summons to active service.
To concentrate her thoughts on mortgages and deeds when she was burning to be on her way to France––to confer power of attorney, audit bills for taxes, for up-keep of line fences, when she was mad to go to New York and find out how quickly she could be sent to France––such things seemed more than a girl could endure.
In Shadow Hill there was scarcely anything to remind her that the fate of the world was being settled for all time.
Only for red service flags here and there, here and there a burly figure in olive-drab swaggering along Main Street, nothing except war-bread, the shortage of coal and sugar, and outrageous prices reminded her that the terrific drama was still being played beyond 45 the ocean to the diapason of an orchestra thundering from England to Asia and from Africa to the Arctic.
But already the eternal signs were pointing to the end. She read the Republican in the morning, the Star at night. Gradually it became apparent to the girl that the great conflagration was slowly dying down beyond the seas; that there was to be no chance of her returning; that there was to be no need of her services even if she were already equipped to render any, and now, certainly, no time for her to learn anything which might once have admitted her to comradeship in the gigantic conflict between man and Satan. She was too late. The world’s tragedy was almost over.
With the signing of the armistice, all dreams of service ended definitely for her.
False news of the suspension of hostilities should have, in a measure, prepared her. Yet, the ultimately truthful news that the war was over made her almost physically ill. For the girl’s ardent religious fervour had consumed her emotional energy during the incessant excitement of the past three years. But now, for this natural ardour, there was no further employment. There was no outlet for mind or heart so lately on fire with spiritual fervour. God was no more; her friend was dead. And now the war had ended. And nobody in the world had any need of her––any need of this woman who needed the world––and love––spiritual perhaps, perhaps profane.
The false peace demonstration, which set the bells of Shadow Hill clanging in the wintry air and the mill whistles blowing from distant villages, left her tired, dazed, indifferent. The later celebration, based on official news, stirred her spiritually even less. And she felt ill.
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There was a noisy night celebration on Main Street, but she had no desire to see it. She remained indoors reading the Star in the sitting room with Max, the cat. She ate no dinner. She cried herself to sleep.
However, now that the worst had come––as she naïvely informed the shocked Martha next morning––she began to feel relieved in a restless, feverish way.
A healthful girl accumulates much bodily energy over night; Palla’s passionate little heart and her active mind completed a storage battery very quickly charged––and very soon over-charged––and an outlet was imperative.
Always, so far in her brief career, she had had adequate outlets. As a child she found satisfaction in violent exercises; in flinging herself headlong into every outdoor game, every diversion among the urchins of her circle. As a school girl her school sports and her studies, and whatever social pleasures were offered, had left the safety valve open.
Later, mistress of her mother’s modest fortune, and grown to restless, intelligent womanhood, Palla had gone abroad with a married school-friend, Leila Vance. Under her auspices she had met nice people and had seen charming homes in England––Colonel Vance being somebody in the county and even somebody in London––a diffident, reticent, agriculturally inclined land owner and colonel of yeomanry. And long ago dead in Flanders. And his wife a nurse somewhere in France.
But before the war a year’s travel and study had furnished the necessary outlet to Palla Dumont. And then––at a charity bazaar––a passionate friendship had flashed into sacred flame––a friendship born at sight between her and the little Grand Duchess Marie.
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War was beginning; Colonel Vance was dead; but imperial inquiry located Leila. And imperial inquiry was satisfied. And Palla became the American companion and friend of the youthful Grand Duchess Marie. For three years that blind devotion had been her outlet––that and their mutual inclination for a life to be dedicated to God.
What was to be her outlet now?––now that the little Grand Duchess was dead––now that God, as she had conceived him, had ceased to exist for her––now that the war was ended, and nobody needed that warm young heart of hers––that ardent little heart so easily set throbbing with the passionate desire to give.
The wintry sunlight flooded the familiar sitting room, setting potted geraniums ablaze, gilding the leather backs of old books, staining prisms on the crystal chandelier with rainbow tints, and causing Max, the family cat, to blink until the vertical pupils of his amber eyes seemed to disappear entirely.
There was some snow outside––not very much––a wild bird or two among the naked apple trees; green edges, still, where snowy lawn and flower border met.
And there was colour in the leafless shrubbery, too––wine-red stems of dogwood, ash-blue berry-canes, and the tangled green and gold of willows. And over all a pale cobalt sky, and a snow-covered hill, where, in the woods, crows sat cawing on the taller trees, and a slow goshawk sailed.
A rich land, this, even under ice and snow––a rich, rolling land hinting of fat furrows and heavy grain; and of spicy, old-time gardens where the evenings were heavy with the scent of phlox and lilies.
Palla, her hands behind her back, seeming very childish and slim in her black gown, stood searching absently 48 among the books for something to distract her––something in harmony with the restless glow of hidden fires hot in her restless heart.
But war is too completely the great destroyer, killing even the serener pleasures of the mind, corrupting normal appetite, dulling all interest except in what pertains to war.
War is the great vandal, too, obliterating even that interest in the classic past which is born of respect for tradition. War slays all yesterdays, so that human interest lives only in the fierce and present moment, or blazes anew at thought of what may be to-morrow.
Only the chronicles of the burning hour can hold human attention where war is. For last week is already a decade ago; and last year a dead century; but to-day is vital and to-morrow is immortal.
It was so with Palla. Her listless eyes swept the ranks of handsome, old-time books––old favourites bound in gold and leather, masters of English prose and poetry gathered and garnered by her grand-parents when books were rare in Shadow Hill.
Not even the modern masters appealed to her––masters of fiction acclaimed but yesterday; virile thinkers in philosophy, in science; enfranchised poets who had stridden out upon Olympus only yesterday to defy the old god’s lightning with unshackled strophes––and sometimes unbuttoned themes.
But it was with Palla as with others; she drifted back to the morning paper, wherein lay the interest of the hour. And nothing else interested her or the world.
Martha announced lunch. Max accompanied her on her retreat to the kitchen. Palla loitered, not 49 hungry, nervous and unquiet under the increasing need of occupation for that hot heart of hers.
After a while she went out to the dining room, ate enough, endured Martha to the verge, and retreated to await the evening paper.
Her attorney, Mr. Tiddley, came at three. They discussed quit-claims, mortgages, deeds, surveys, and reported encroachments incident to the decay of ancient landmarks. And the conversation maddened her.
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